’selfish’ vs ‘the narcissist’ II

ive gotten some interesting comments on my previous blog. first off, im surprised people have read it, for it is long-winded; more or less im surprised anybody reads in this time where instant-gratification is celebrated. in any case, i felt a little compelled to clarify a couple things:

first, i don’t think that having you’re own child is egotistic and a self-centered choice in life. i have actually been contemplating the idea of parenthood and adulthood, and i really do believe that becoming a parent, as any other position that makes one sacrifice their life and happiness for another individual, is incredibly heroic. realizing what i say in class and my actions as an individual adheres quickly to others under my watch made me realize that i had to be a better person for my students. i haven’t changed my life dramatically, but i am more aware that i need to be there for others and set a good example. it made me realize what parenting was all about, without being an actual parent.  i think i was just challenging the idea of, why not adopt - which people have given me good and honest reasons (thank you miss scarlet for your input - i bet you are an amazing mother.) the replies i have gotten deal mostly with cultural understandings and experiences that were shared. i have a cousin who was adopted, and i know his life was very challenging, but i believe his parents and i love him just the same. and i think that was my position, that i think whether or not birth-related, there would be an abundance of love to share regardless. perhaps this is my position as a romantic.

second, my real point was to say, i believe that people can fulfill life and do well for others whether or not someone decides to bear their own children. i dont believe the sole purpose in life relies on giving birth to their own child. as much as i oppose this idea, i won’t say its ‘wrong,’ because there really is no ‘wrong’ reason here, just another opinion and i respect the perspective and honesty. and third, which has nothing to do with anything,  i don’t think negatively with the ‘narcissus’ i went to dinner with, more or less i am amused that he and i are polar opposites.