CANNES: "A Long, Hard Day at the Office."

So, the film market side of the festival is officially winding down now.  Some have left or are in the process of leaving.  Others are scrambling to take their final meetings.  We were among the latter. 

Yesterday, we caught an early train to Cannes, checked in with Cineville at the Carlton, and spent the next several hours meeting with various companies, including Hyde Park, Universal (again), 2929 Entertainment, Paramount Vantage (again), ContentFilm International, and a couple of others whose names escape me right now.  Overall, the meetings have been going rather well and, in most cases, have led to follow-ups in London and Los Angeles over the next couple of weeks.  I don’t want to jinx anything, but it looks like we’re on the verge of closing a deal in regard to the Asian rights. 

All that said, things haven’t exactly been all sunshine and rainbows.  In fact, the word that perhaps best describes yesterday as a whole is “bipolar.”  It was definitely a bipolar day.  For those of you who might be unfamiliar with the disorder, I ripped the following definition from Wikipedia:

“Bipolar disorder is not a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders defined by the presence of one or more episodes of abnormally elevated mood, clinically referred to as mania. Individuals who experience manic episodes also commonly experience depressive episodes or symptoms, or mixed episodes in which features of both mania and depression are present. These episodes are normally separated by periods of normal mood, but in some patients, depression and mania may rapidly alternate, known as rapid cycling. Extreme manic episodes can sometimes lead to psychotic symptoms such as delusions and hallucinations.”

Sometimes, I think I might have this disorder, too.  Yesterday, for example, we heard the news regarding the Asian rights and we were absolutely thrilled.  I got heart palpitations and Charlie tried to do a cartwheel.  This would qualify as “elevated mood,” right? 

Then, a mere half-hour later, we were meeting with an executive, who will remain nameless, from a company, which will also remain nameless.  Right away, the executive asked us what the concept of “Jasmine” was and I told him/her, “It’s the story of a man who’s struggling to come to terms with the unsolved murder of his wife…"  Blah…blah…blah…

I think it’s safe to say that it wasn’t his/her cup of tea.  This was disappointing, but hardly depressing.  I know it’s probably hard for some of you to believe, but I’ve been rejected a lot.  :)  What was depressing and more than a little infuriating, too, was the way the executive then proceeded to tell me what was “wrong” with my idea.  (By the way, few things piss me off more than being told I’m “wrong” in regard to matters of personal taste.)  Anyway, apparently, what our story lacks is a “super-hook.” 

Super... hook?

Now, you have to bear in mind that I’ve been in this business for a little while now and, furthermore, as a former Creative Executive and as a writer, I’ve sat on both sides of the desk.  And I can honestly say that, in all of my experience, I’ve never heard the term, “super-hook,” before.   Never once. 

I turned and looked at Charlie.  Charlie raised an eyebrow.  I turned back to the executive and asked him/her what precisely a “super-hook” is.  The executive then defined the term for me, as if I was a fucking chimpanzee, “It’s an incident that occurs early on in the film that engages the audience and makes them want to watch.” 

I told him/her that that sounded like the definition of a “hook” and asked him/her where the “super” part came in.  That’s when the executive told me, “A ‘super-hook’ really engages the audience and really makes them want to watch.”  

Oh.  

“Do all of your films have super-hooks?”  I asked.  (Apparently, they do.  Lucky them.)  I asked him/her to give me an example of one such “super-hook.”

“Nazi-zombies,” the executive replied -- with gusto.  

I wanted to flip the table over and storm out of there.  I turned and looked at Charlie again.  He could see that I was on the verge of doing something very destructive and was probably trying to figure out if he had enough Euros on him for bail.  

Needless to say, the walk to lunch was a quiet one.  I think this qualifies as a “depressive episode,” actually.  Eventually, Charlie, worried about my prolonged silence, asked, “So, dude…what are you…uh… thinking right now?”  

“I think I want a big beer at lunch,” I said.  “Actually, make that two big beers.  Can we afford that?”  

Charlie nodded, “We’ll get you some of that steak tartare shit you’ve been wanting to try, too.”  

And, suddenly, I was manic again.  I think that qualifies as “rapid cycling.” 

At the end of every day, as we ride home on the train, Charlie and I make a point of asking ourselves, “What did we learn today?”  

Speaking for myself, I’ve been learning a lot lately.  Unfortunately, I’ve been learning a lot lately because I’ve been making a lot of mistakes lately.  Some small, many big.

What have I learned?  

I’ve learned that I need to find more productive ways of dealing with stress.  If I don’t, I’m going to be very lonely.  

I know that I’m a paranoid person by nature.  I’ve learned that stress exacerbates this problem.  I know that I need to surround myself with friends and loved ones during these stressful times.  I’ve learned that, ironically, I tend to push these same friends and loved ones away during such times.  

It’s a curious thing, my personality.  I hope I can unlearn the less appealing aspects of it.  As with all works in progress, I guess we’ll find out…

-Me