freedom from the known

turns up a miasma of implausible convolutions ...when you feel like caving into something you know is so wrong ... yet unbridled spontaneity seem to tug wildly at those heartstrings, orchestrating the meek guarded heart beats into an escalated crescendo .... what should one do ? to seek freedom from the known ? or save oneself from yet another vicious cycle ? i go to mac donald's and wait to see if chicken nuggets will help ; ) or ... i think about long term probable ramifications versus short-term immediate pleasure . and sometimes the here and now deserves to take priority over what one may think happens later .... ultimately . the moments last only an instant .... and the right person or action to match exactly to that moment leaves a lifetime of memory .i gulp another carlsberg to tame the butterflies and calm my frayed nerves   of deliberation . of crucifixion.of waiting . of wanting. of confusion.of compulsion.i wish the glow from my blackberry would illuminate the answered smile . love does not make itself felt in the desire for copulation (a desire that extends to an infinite number of women ) but in the desire for shared sleep (a desire limited to only one woman)i want my bitch now .