to daftly avoid detail and hence mushiness, i wrote the following short story. the original purpose was to record a certain, moreso depressive measure of feelings that consumed me for quite a lengthy period, from which i developed my unyielding love for music and life.
Forgiven.
You've always had a great love for the sky.
Even before you came into this world and knew that there existed such a thing,
you loved it with every ounce of you.
The sky, it moved you in such a way that was beyond this lifetime of understanding
and yet you never felt a need to ever question or wonder why it was that way.
For you were happy.
Then something changed and my world became empty.
I stormed tears and hurled ice and spat out chilling gasps of air
until it had been ages since anyone had seen the light of day
or felt the need to come out from hiding to gaze upon the beauty of the sky.
For there was no beauty left.
And it was unbearable.
Years passed as the anger grew.
And all I could do was linger upon
this picture.
A picture from the moment you came to your decision to leave.
All that I had left of you.
The view of the sky was so breathtaking.
It enveloped you in soft shades of pink and purple and blue.
It was beautiful.
It all used to be so beautiful, so much so that
I could never understand how you could carelessly turn your back on it,
like it was just a part of
the background.
But what could I do?
I suppressed my past.
Placed it somewhere beyond the furthest ethereal white marking.
And I forgot about you
and everything that had happened.
And then the other day I came uponan inconsistency
to this peacefully mundane life that I had built for myself.
It was a picture of a girl
with tears drowning her beautiful brown eyes.
These eyes spoke of a pain so insufferable that my own tears swelled in pity.
And the sight was so agonizing that I had to put the picture down.
It wasn't until much later,
after I had gathered myself from my ditherand from the realization that after all these yearsI was still just
an open wound,
that I looked at the picture again.
How could life possibly be that painful for her?
And as I paused there,the enlightenment that i had been so craving all these years,suddenly came without reserveand revealed itself in the form of a sky.a skythat sang with familiarity.And it dawned on methat it could have been
a glorious sunrise,
a tumultuous hurricane,
a blameless white snowstorm,
and I still would have overlooked it.
And in those brief moments as I stared at that picture,
eight years worth of anger towards you
simply disappeared.
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