"Contract to be Gay" or "A Trip to Cowboy Mountain"

this is the line where the disclaimer goes-----

you may get injured reading this blog

Yes ,  last year I had the great opportunity to be in the film "Contract Lover"

This film has done so much for me, and I am so grateful to have this chance.

It was fun. and probably the hardest role I have ever played.  Mainly because I played a gay character.   this is not as easy as it sounds, while it is a staple of hong kong movies, it doesn't happen in Mainland films as often.  It was lucky too.

Actually, I was told that I was the first person to portray a Homosexual man in a major role,"in a mainland china film"  （and not get banned,  ofcourse leslie cheung had done it before,)  I don't know if that is true, but it sounds cool

Talk about the right place at the right time.

Ok   let me paint the picture for you all.  Back in the end of 2006 around November I was in a Cha San ting.  a Hk tea shop in beijing where I usually go for a bite.

I was lamenting about breaking up with The Love of my life  to a friend of mine.

a friend of mine who was speaking in a rather boisterous manner with her hands flying in every direction telling me, that I shouldn't be heart broken and that great things would surely be around the corner for me, You know, all the great advice you get from your friends after your heart is ripped out by someone else.  as my Brotha from anotha motha Big Mike Leeder always says "She ripped out my heart just to show me what a broken heart looks like"

so anyway, my friend is telling me all this great stuff, stiff upper lip and all that, when her boisterous hand waving smacks into my milk tea sending it flying across the table in the direction of my lap.  (now this is where it will sound like I am exaggerating, but I assure you I am not)   My spider-sense tingled,  (ok maybe that bit is a slight exaggeration, it just fizzed a little ;-)

and then everything went into slow motion, like one of those freeze shots from the matrix.  Then I jumped up into the air just as all the tea splattered onto the seat i had just occupied,  but what goes up must come down, so i did, come down, right onto the head of the guy sitting behind me.

 He got freaked out, and that wonderful Word that people from Hong Kong  love to say (You know, the one the say in the Mountain Dew commercials)  rang out across the restaurant.

I got off him quickly and apologized in Chinese. Then He said in cantonese "wow foreigners speak mandarin really well now too" then I said in Cantonese "yeah and I can speak some cantonese too"  then he looked at me and we both laughed and we introduced ourselves.

So this poor fellow I landed on turned out to be Alfred Cheung jian tin.    The Director of such films as "her fatal ways"   and "on the run"  and the super action movie with Sammo Hung and Maggie Cheung "Paper Marriage"  which if you have not seen, you must.  mainly to see Magie Cheung Mud wrestling, quite a scene. fun for both both sides of the chromozones .

SO we chatted and I told him about what I do in China, and He said he had a film he was prepping, but it didn't have any foreigners in it, but if he had a role for me he would call me.

Months went by, and then I was in yet another HK tea shop. and ran into Alfred again.  He exclaims to me "i've been looking all over for you."  So he was at the casting stage for his film a comedy called "contract lover".   He told me that after he met me he had rethought one of the roles in the scrīpt and changed it from a chinese character to a foreigner.( the reason why i will tell you later, but first here's the zinger)

So he tells me that this role is the number 2 male lead. Wow i thought, sounds great.  Ritchie Ren is the Lead.  Wow I thought again.  being next to a top actor like that could help me alot.

and Fan Bing Bing is the female lead ,  My heart started Pumping audibly.  ;)

I got myself under control,  But Alfred's momentum had slowed a bit.  scarily.

"but," he said. 

"but what?" I said

"You're Character is Gay"

"uh... oh.  "  I said "Do I have to Kiss any men?"

"No" he said

"ok, i'll do it"

Later I learned that they changed the role from a Chinese character to a Foreigner because they were afraid that the film would not make it past the chinese censors because it was such a prominent role, and a foreigner would be more acceptable for the chinese audience

So sometimes I say  God Bless Censorship in China!!!     everyday.... sometimes

  But as I said,  playing gay is hard.   

My first day on set I had basically prepared a character much like Chris Katan's "Mango" character from saturday night live,    Alfred was not happy with that, at all.   He started sweating actually,  and then decided to calm  my nerves by taking me to the side and telling me he thought he made a huge mistake by casting me in this role and was thinking about writing the character out.  

that helped.   "what do you want me to do" I asked

"be subtle gay" he said. "be Gay, but just be a little Gay" 

I don't think you could imagine the look on my face, but it was more than slightly confused.

then he took 2 steps back pressed his elbows into his sides arms down and hands out like a tootoo and slightly wiggled his hips from side to side, while pouting a bit and said

"just go home tonight and do this in the mirror,  I want you to find the gay inside you"

I laughed histerically.

He didn't

So I panicked.

that night I called a friend of mine who actually is Gay and i asked him.

"you gotta help me man, please"

"what is it" he asked

"Show me how to be Gay"

His reaction was not unlike Harvey Firestein's reaction to Robin williams asking him to show him how to be a woman in Mrs. Doubtfire.

  I kid you not .  this is my life.  I wonder about it myself too at times.

So He taught me how to be gay ,  I know what the people with the dirty minds in the crowd are thinking now.

no, no no he didn't teach me to be THAT gay. 

Just actions and expressions. looks . and thoughts.  I asked alot of questions that made him blush,  it was funny,  i feel sorry for anyone who overheard THAT conversation. It was one of five most ridiculous in depth lines of questionings ever performed on the planet.  I think he felt a little naked after that Q&A.   

So I did a crash course in uh being gay .  I have to say though one of the funniest films for me now is that Adam sandler film "I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry" 

Gay

So I got it finally, and the director was happy with my performance from that day on.  It was hard, because I had to do so much on th fly, but my scenes were sequential nearly and i was able to develop the character as we went along.  but every night I was in that mirror swishing back and fourth finding the gay guy in the mirror.

He incidentally stayed on screen.  but it was fun to be Alex,  (thats the characters name)

it all sounds funny.  and this is the way it all happened.  but it was seriously the most difficult role I have ever played.  But I feel I grew alot as an actor for it. Not Gay

He incidentally stayed on screen.  but it was fun to be Alex,  (thats the characters name)

it all sounds funny.  and this is the way it all happened.  but it was seriously the most difficult role I have ever played.  But I feel I grew alot as an actor and as a person for that matter.

To Alex.  Wherever You May Be.    Stay There.

Unclassifiable

gee  glad to see we got internet distribution on you tube.

Video: http://youtube.com/watch?v=8diQTfh62BU

HMMM.

well kind of neat anyway.  here are some Interesting scenes from "contract Lover"  the film I did with Richie Ren,  Fan Bing Bing, Yuen Wah    and Kate Tsui.

This film was great to work on, and I made some Great friends on it.  Such a fun shoot.

Alfred Cheung is one of the Best Director's I have ever worked with.

I really learned alot from him,   and I'm grateful for his patience,  because I was always Picking his brains about his shots and how he wanted to edit  and how to compose scenes and why he made this and that decision,  gee  the man is a saint for not shooting me...etc thats him next to me.

also in this Picture is the one and only Mr. N G

Ng See Yuen.     he's on the far left next to Richie.   as advertised on the trailer for the film "No retreat No Surrender"

     "The Creator of Jackie Chan and jean Claude Van Damne"

no joke.  if you can find it watch it and it says that on the trailer it's hilarious.

Legendary producer of "Drunken master" , and "Snake in eagles shadow" "Ninja in the Dragons Den" (where you can see a young Hiroyuki Sanada)  and a billion other great kung fu and Action films.  This is the super dream.  I didn't know he was the Producer until the second day of shooting, they never bothered to mention it to me, I guess they thought since I am a foreigner I wouldn't know who he was,  I came to asia to work with this guy!!

I nearly fainted when I saw him walking on to the set!  "I'm working for you?" I exclaimed.  He just looked at me and smiled.

"You made drunken master!"  and Snake in eagles shadow!"

he kept smiling  and just said "yeah?"    I think he thought I was nuts.  but Mr. NG is great I learned alot working with him aswell.  

Richie Ren Xian Qi is probably one of the coolest people around.  Such a hard worker. An actor a SInger and such a sincere person and a dear friend, who has turned out to be there for me when I least expected it.

Richie is probably hands down "The Man"   So devoted to his work and his family, I don't know how he has the energy for it all.   He's become one of my role models.  for how to live in a Happy, Healthyand balanced  way.

I have to give a shout out here.   The Is Zheng Xin Min,

otherwise known as Min Ge.    He's Richie's Body guard.

He used to be a shaolin Monk.  and a Sanda Champion. one mean mother,  He Protects Lots of Singers from Hong Kong and Taiwan.

but you would never guess it, He was the Heart and soul of the production. Keeping everyone Laughing and happy all day long.    He got such a huge personality.  I think he should be a Star. he's hilarious.  and a good friend.

Fan Bing Bing is a queen, Nay,  an Empress!   She has become one of the most elegent young women in all of China I believe.  The press is always mean to her, but she is such a wonderful person that deserves much more respect for her work.  She is a very devoted actress.  The Girl is a complete proffessional and really creates some interesting roles.  I have a huge crush on her by the way, don't tell her ;-)

Yuen Wah is like my uncle now,  what a dream it was to get a chance to work with one of my lifelong hero's .   I was really proud of the scene with him,  because I had to beg to get it in the film, where Yuen Wah Is teaching me the Huo family style.  I have to admit that the moves I just made up on the spot, Yuen wah yelled out some old kung fu poses, and I just did techniques that seemed like the names to me.  we shot it twice, as we were running out of light..  often times while we were all waiting Wah ge would tell us endless stories from his years and years of film making.   growing up with Jackie and sammo and the other seven little treasures, and also some scary stunt stories. 

Kate Tsui is another example of a classy woman in our industry.  I had some of the most interesting conversations with her.  She is a girl that is definitely going somewhere.  You guys should check out one of her other films called "Eye in The Sky" she does a class job in that one.

She has an intelligence deep behind these beautiful eyes that is very keen and almost intimidating. I wouldn't be surprised if she were to end up being a producer or something later on.   And such a joy to talk to.  Kate Brings back the Art of conversation. plus she is an excellent salsa dancer!   Sorry I don't have any pics with her.

Thanks for reading, have fun. see you all later.

Gee now that I put this all into context, that pic at the top of my page seems kinda scary, looks like I'm gonna rape that guy.  Thanks Rottendoubt for that.

;-)

(that's Yao Han by the way, a Guang Zhou [Canton] based actor, you can see him on Stefan Delongs Blogs too)