Confused not dazed...need help from u all...

Alright guys, help me out if u can...

here's the scenario....

A very distant relative of mine....that  really respects me as a relative and also as a drummer coz thats what that person is doing for a living now..

 born a girl but decided long ago to dress, act and be on the guys team...in short...TB...tomboy, SHIM,a girl that decided to play on the other team....whatever u wanna call him...her...

well, I have no problem with that nor am I being discriminating....but the truth is ,

I really don't know how to refer this person....Do I still call her a her? or a him....or is it Shim? she has a guys name, dresses like a guy, talks like one and hence is one....but everytime I try to give her/ him compliment to the people around me, I just find it hard to categorize her...

Am I gonna start referring her as a girl or a guy? thats my simple question....

help me out please...

cheers

Junny