A Handful of Bitter Pills

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I really do try not to be bitter. But single-hood, combined with celibacy, have made me at least... .

Here's a few reasons why.

Recently I find that the most pronounced effect pretty young women have on me is making me realize my own (by comparison) advanced age. I never try to talk to them (read: hit on them) because I am so squeamishly aware of the age difference.

Another thing that makes me bitter?

People (often women) telling me what a great guy I am and how it is I don't have a girlfriend.

Guess what?

A) The people who say I'd make a great partner for someone never seem to .

Not even the .

Which at first may sound a bit harsh and 'laddish', but then again I think it fits rather squarely under the rubric of 'put up or shut up.'

Sadly for me, it usually ends up more like 'put out or shut out,' and I again fail to score.

B) I'm a trained researcher. I know about logical progressions, both complete and incomplete.

Science dictates the following:

While A may equal B, B does not always equal C:Here's where it breaks down. Following the 'if - then' construct, ideally

C:

But NO!!!: B ≠ C. But you know what really dumped a load of salt in my congee recently?

Being a and a .

It happened after the tea judging ceremony I took part in. When my friend and I got on the MTR recently, I noticed something very strange.

There were two women in the train, both of them over 6 feet tall.

At first I thought they may have been models, as skinny as they were and dressed in the clothes they wore.

You know how tall they were? They were so tall that I'd gladly throw off my self-imposed ban on dating women 50% my age. After all, they were 95%-100% of my height!

They were tall.[if gte mso 9]> u2:WordDocument u2:ViewNormal/u2:View u2:Zoom0/u2:Zoom u2:Compatibility u2:BreakWrappedTables/ u2:SnapToGridInCell/ u2:WrapTextWithPunct/ u2:UseAsianBreakRules/ u2:UseFELayout/ /u2:Compatibility u2:BrowserLevelMicrosoftInternetExplorer4/u2:BrowserLevel /u2:WordDocument <![endif]

There's a lot to be said for an overabundance of raw height.----------Digression/backgrounder:----------I'm 6'4" tall. One reason I never liked dancing, especially slowly, is because of height disparities. Kisses on her forehead may be cute, but when you're already bending down just to do , it can throw a kink into (or a back out of) such an ostensibly romantic situation.

I had a girlfriend once who was 6' tall. I admit, it was nice to look a woman in the eye for a change (in more settings than just one), and it made me feel very, very normal, at least in terms of sexual dimorphism. It's a feeling I wouldn't mind repeating.  

Tall women are actually very easy to deal with. The most direct means is to simply walk right up to them and declare "I'm not afraid of you." They'll be taken aback by such candor, and in my own case, they'll be surprised to have to look up at me.

But you know the Ultimate Weapon in ' '?

These girls are anomalies of gender.They're much taller than their peer group and unfortunately (for them, not me) taller than most of their potential mates.This means that they don't get treatedlike their peers.They end up as athletes or models. They're not 'normal', and certainly not . They're not encouraged to act (or to be accepted as) .

Quite frankly, some of their most basic needs go unmet.

At 6'4" and 260#, nobody ever thinks of as needing to feel comforted or concerned about. I'm a walking altercation that does bring out a woman's nurturing instinct.

I can admit, sometimes it would be nice.

Nature apparently enforces an inverse corollary between size and submissive behaviors, either self- or other-generated. The weak and diminutive get all the hugs and cuddles.

selves

What does this have to do with tall women?

Ohhh, this is so great...

Once you know them well enough (days, hours, vodka, it varies), reach out and .

Literally.

Hold them like this:

Like their father used to when they were little (a long time ago, never, it varies).

These women get treated like little girls, and they it, even if they're not (yet) aware of it.

So treat them that way. Make them feel .

I've seen that happen to tall women in my arms. The look they give me is downright scary.

It's almost .

It's .

It's great.But never mind...

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-----End of Digression/Backgrounder-----

An incredibly small percentage of women in the world are 6' tall or more.

An incredibly small percentage of those women are .

A very small percentage of women are inHong Kong.

very incredibly

Yeah, but what are the odds that I would be in proximity of not one, but such women?

Well, they're obviously higher than the odds of me being in proximity of two very tall women .

Sadly, I was never going to get the chance to step to these two women in the MTR and say " ."

First of all, both of them spoke Mandarin.

It's a dialect I am not conversant in beyond 'hello,' 'shut up,' 'thank you,' and 'I love you.'

Second of all, I wasn't going to sh*t all over my friendship.

Any more than I already had.

Confession: Not only did I intentionally follow these women into the same car, I also made the mistake of telling my friend that I was doing so.

Notice that word: .

And the word before it: friend.

Basic rules say that it is at the very least impolite to try and 'mack' in front of a woman you are with, no matter what your relationship to her.

This goes double if the woman with you expresses any displeasure at your acknowledgment, much less macking, of other women.

I got double-teamed, and not in the good way. My friend was obviously not happy. She made a face like she'd bitten into a lemon. With a cockroach in it.

I didn't win the Fate Lottery, nor did I try to massage my chances, so to speak.

It just wasn't worth offending and alienating a friend, someone who has always treated me well and shown a genuine concern for my welfare.

Besides, neither of these girls was necessarily very pretty.

They got off the train in Mongkok and walked away..

In an odd way, these events make me feel better, not bitter.

I at least proved to myself that I'm a good friend (relatively, I know).

Also, if/when I go the without meeting one woman that tall again in Hong Kong, never mind , I'll know that on August 14, 2009, I used up all that luck and quite understandably I am not entitled to any more.

Postscript: It was brought to my attention by my friend Sidney that these women were more than likely members ofChina's volleyball team, in town for a tournament. So hopefully my chances haven't been used up.