All's Fair Because Love is War

God knows where I got this idea from, but sometimes its fun to extend a metaphor beyond any and all reason.Romance, or being in love, is like invading a country: drama, explosions, injury, valor, etc.

Disclaimer - This metaphor primarily involves invasion of the heart (and other organs, admittedly) and is therefore non-gendered, and ought not be interpreted as a one-dimensional and reprehensibly phallo-centric construct. I say this in the hopes of dissuading anyone from hitting the big red button that would put the Etheridge Militia on alert and have them strapping on their guns preparing for an invasion...A necessary prerequisite for invasion is the blind faith that it will succeed. Even if you think the success of your invasion is a sure thing, you are still taking a chance.

You must believe that the invaded nation will surrender as a result of your invasion, gladly or otherwise.  Still, caution and rational thought must prevail.A nation may appear or even present itself as though it is ripe for or receptive to invasion, but that doesn't give you the right to treat it as if it wants to be invaded or gets invaded frequently.It helps if your army appears, and indeed is, capable, well-equipped and committed. Of course, armies are made for invasions, so their intent is inherently obvious. Nature gives predator cats natural camouflage with visually disruptive patterns in their fur. Invasions, if done right, are well-planned and well thought ought. there has to be a good reason to invade another country. Of course, 'good' is a relative term open to broad interpretation and depends heavily on a nation's goals and aspirations.

Ideally, one would like to invade a country that is stable, has good natural or economic resources, potential for growth, security, and an abundance of arable land (though not all of us are agriculturally inclined).The tiny island nation of Tuvalu has no natural resources, yet its natural beauty has attracted many nations.The city-state of Singapore has no natural resources either, but a strong and well-developed infrastructure and small army make it a prime candidate for invasion.But all that planning and preparation have to lead somewhere, right? Anyone can thinkabout invading. It takes a bold and confident nation to actually doit. Sooner or later, it's time to step up. And that time is D-Day.

D-Day is always a tense, exciting time. The preparations, the planning, the spit-shine, all your work comes down to this: Lock and load.The use of chemical weapons has been banned due to their inhumane nature and effect.Invasions involve lots of excitement, like daring parachute drops behind enemy (panty) lines and beach landings under withering enfilades."Can I buy you a drink?"In the first stages of the invasion, there may be skirmishes or all-out battles. It depends on the firepower each nation can bring to bear.The Nazis believed that victory would be achieved through deployment of increasingly large weapons such as thesuper heavy mortar "Karl" pictured here, used in the siege of Sevastopol in 1941.The invasion cannot break through to create havoc in the enemy's rear (!)  until the invader has breached the defenses. This may be difficult, especially considering the terrain and/or the extent of defensive preparations the invaded nation can muster. At other times or places, there may be only token resistance.While the D-Day landing at Omaha beach was a hellish nightmare for invading Allied troops, soldiers at nearby Utah Beach simply walked ashore amidst desultory enemy fire. 

Invasions, like all grand historical events, are comprised of a large number of small actions. Big invasions are composites of a lot of small attacks.

Many an attack has been postponed or even abandoned for a lack of cover.On the other hand, attacksin some townshave been fought under total cover advantageous to both sides:Note the language on the signs.On the home front, there must be constant vigilance against sabotage and subterfuge. No one wants to be back-stabbed by other nations who claim neutrality but secretly work for one side or the other. Worse still is to suffer at the hands of your own citizens. The most powerful weapon on earth.Invasions often involveenlisting the aid of allies, either friends or family, metaphorically speaking (in World War I the leaders of Germany and Russia were first cousins).

These alliances are usually temporary, expedient, and last only as long as the invasion itself. Often, alliances crumble or even backfire when an ally switches sides."She promised she'd love me forever, but she dumped me for that @sshole that she knows I have beef with!"The worst is when a third nation plays the other two against each other simply for its own amusement, or because no one wants to invade it, or it hasn't the courage and resources to invade one itself.During World War Two, Switzerland gladly stored plundered Nazi gold as well as Allied money, profiting from both while siding with neither.

In some cases, you may not be the only invading country. In fact, a country may have been invadedand overrun so many times as to be criss-crossed with the tank tracks of many other nations.People always wear their history on the outside. Some people justlook like they've been around the block quite a few times, even in the dark.Drunk, mentally impaired or simply stupid leaders are responsible for decisions to invade that any hint of intelligence would have prevented."Dude, I was so stink-hammered drunk last night, I ended up with this total skank and now she has my number!"Invasions are sometimes immediate disasters while others take longer to turn sour. Battle casualties are sometimes lower than those inflicted by indigenous diseases such as malaria, dyptheria and jungle rot.The invention of penicillin not only helps minimize invasion fatalities but can make leaders act more boldly in terms of the number invasions they initiate. Sometimes surreptitious invasions are discovered and political mayhem ensues.The Bay of Pigs fiasco and the political fallout shook the Kennedy administration to the core.Unlike the invasions of being inlove, lovingsomeonelong term is like occupying a country for the rest of your life. Which may seem like an eternity or the blink of an eye.

"I do."But hey, you successfully invaded that country (what you don't know is that it alloweditself to be invaded, you only thinkyou conquered it), and you declared in front of God  (and CNN) your intention to occupy it for as long as it took.  You might say that you saw, you came, you conquered.Whereas some invasions can be summarized as I came, I sored, I chancred.Bravo for you, you planted the flag!

Now comes the hard part.Occupation, compared to invasion, is not as exciting and is much more difficult to measure both progress and/or success in the venture. Takingground is a lot easier than keeping it. But sometimes you stay the course simply because you said you would.

My grandparents lived in separate rooms since before I was born. 'Til death do us part. Until then, get the f@#$ away from me..

It takes total commitment and endless resources, patience, and perseverance, and of course constant vigilance for a successful occupation. A little effort at winning over the 'hearts and minds' never hurts either.

Often, the occupying army becomes apathetic and weaker

while a growing resistance movement gathers strength.

There is the occasional flaring up of the 'violence' of old (both good and bad), but in general occupation is a much less glamorous venture.

Often, both sides can become rather apathetic. One or both may forget why the invasion and occupation took place at all. But both sides adjust and simply carry on as if there's no war at all.

If an occupation lasts long enough, anomalous wartime behavior gets normalized into everyday humdrum.Even if you've happily, successfully, and with utmost commitment occupied a nation for years, you may occasionally wish to invade other countries, or at least send the army on weekend maneuvers.The armies of several nations are cooperating in the largest peacetime military exercise in recent history, known as  Dishonorable Discharge.But in this media-saturated age, keeping such actions out of public awareness is nearly impossible (see Bay of Pigs, above).

Besides, too many supposedly sovereign nations allow invasion simply because they are looking for an occupying army to comfort, sustain, and support them even if the invader is already occupying a nation!

These shameless nations seem unconcerned with the health and welfare of the occupied country the invader is absent from.

Then again, sometimes the invader doesn't either.Satellite imagery shows telltale evidence of invader's occupation commitment.Such maneuvers invite only disaster. History tells us again and again that no one wins a two-front war.

June 22, 1941: Hitler launches Operation Barbarossa, an invasion of Soviet Russia that puts Germany at war in the West and East. Less than four years later, Hitler was dead.

You're much better off devoting all your resources to the occupation you've already gotten yourself into. Because often they areworth it.

Occupations can produce nations that gain economic strength such that they no longer wish or need to make gains through military means. But that doesn't mean they don't think about invasions, either.Especially when that white flag goes up. See 'growing resistance movement' above.After WW2, the USSR, France, Britain, and the United States occupied Germany, and it become one of the world's strongest economies, producing (along with Japan) some of the world's best mass-production automobiles.German exports have become quite popular on the world market. In August of 1945, the United States dropped two atomic bombs on Japan in order to force surrender without an invasion.Arranged marriages are often accomplished through the threat or commission of acts of violence, often extreme.America then occupied Japan, restructuring both their economy and the society. Japan now boasts one of the strongest economies in the world and its people, strangely enough, harbor a generally positive view of Americans. I wouldn't blame Japanese people for hating Americans, but they seem to tolerate or even like us.

Of course, it is a verymutual feeling.Some Americans still would like to invade parts of Japan. It would be easy from Hong Kong.My bags are packed.Occupation canand doeswork. It takes commitment, will, and resolve. The costs are high, but the rewards are even greater.

At the basis of your motivation, however, must be a positive attitude towards the nation you are occupying. If you invade, occupy, and continue occupation because you love that nation and want to protect it and see it flourish, then it is infinitely worth it. Many people come to New York to see the United Nations.