Hot Bodies and a Babe

The professor locked himself out tonight in yet another incident showing that education and stupidity are not incapable of residing in the same skull. So his friends had to come let him into his own house.But he got to see his goddaughter, so it was good.I drive lots of women to drink when I touch them."Mommy, my godfather is retarded; look at him!!!"

Notice my t-shirt, too, by the way. Ever the role model...Winsome looks like that because I held her up over my head and made her cry. I didn't mean to and I feel very bad about it. I promised not to do it any more but I am not sure she believes me...One reason El Dopa forgot his keys was because he was in a hurry to get out and meet the Movie Night regulars for a movie.The film sucked rancid chicken salad out of a dead jackal's ass with a platinum straw, so I won't mention its name...

But I will say that all too frequently these days I find myself wishing I knew the Mandarin for "Har har har!!! This film is hilarious!!!" and "What a good movie!!!" because you can tell that those are exactlythe reactions the films were made to elicit, if you know what I'm saying.

The other reason Captain Brainfart left his keys at home was because he was transfixed by two hot new bodies on his bed.

His own, of course, not being one of them by any stretch of the imagination...This guitar will be getting a special paint job by a certain AnD artist who has performed the miracle of finally allowing me to 'get' art. This one will get a reddish stain and will be used for slide guitar and crunchy rhythms. Oh, and I did bring one other hot body home with me. The Golden Rock's ability to read Japanese allowed me to get my sweaty hands on a brand new copy of a certain Japanese media personality's CD that was released in 2006; he passed it to me during Movie Night. I was hoping this one had the DVD with the PV for the song, but I will just have to buy another one, I guess.This is the cover art. It's... inspirational. You should see the back cover, no pun intended.

If I ever get the chance, I'll ask her to sign it "Happy 40th Birthday!" because it was released on that same day. Which likely is a lot more funny to me than you.

And it's a lot more likely inscription than "You are painfully huge, but thanks for the ride..."

Stay tuned, because The Lapsed Catholic, who upgraded his previously guaranteed ticket to hell by spending Christmas with a former AV star, may end up in the lounge at the top of the 747 to hell by making an iconoclastic debacle of yet another major Christian holiday. Will advise as details make themselves known.

Pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death (said the man most likely to be cast as a jackass in a Nativity play), please.