Movie Review: Kick Ass Girls/爆3俏嬌娃

I attended the ‘gala premiere’ of this movie.

Don’t ask me how or why, because it would be unfair of me to put the person who got me the ticket at risk of professional retribution.

Kick Ass Girls/爆3俏嬌娃  is the story of three women who don’t always get along very well and end up having several very weird adventures.

Yes, that’s vague. Because I don’t want to spoil the story.

Because it’s such a convoluted and ridiculous story that telling it would probably bewilder you and it would definitely embarrass me.

And that sounds snarky and dismissive, I admit, but I sincerely don’t mean it that way.

Life is about choices.

We have choices about what we do, and about the things we say.

I watched this movie. And I have to make choices about how to think and feel about it, and how to talk about it.

I could say that this film is a narrative abomination, that it makes no sense at all, and that it’s such a mess it’s confounding.

But I honestly think it was done on purpose. It seems intentional.

No one could sincerely make a movie this bizarre and narratively twisted.

This movie is deconstructionist; it takes whatever you thought a movie was and destroys it.

There’s no way anyone thought this movie could be taken seriously, so they embrace the surreally farcical aspect of the movie.

It’s not a parody movie. It’s a parody of movies.

It’s a lot of fun.

The only time it falters is when it (apparently) expects you to take some (any) of it seriously.

Chrissie Chau even does okay with her acting.

Not great, but okay.

It doesn’t help that just as I would start to think she was believable, something in the movie would go horribly wrong and I had to laugh at it again.

It also doesn’t help that she either chose (or was directed to) act out emotions like concern, for example, by making a concerned face and moving her head from left to right.

The camera would then show us what she’s concerned about, and then show her being concerned again.

Which she displayed by moving her head from left to right.

Yes. Recycled emotive displays. A very environmentally friendly movie.

That’s an example of how this film obviously isn’t trying to be serious and is poking fun at itself.

Because the alternative is just too terrifying to even contemplate.

They had to know they were being funy.

This movie is the most thoroughly comedic film I’ve ever seen.

EVERYTHING about this movie is funny.

And I mean that in a good way.

I laughed when other people in the cinema laughed, and I laughed on my own a lot too.

This film is exploitative, ridiculous, and absolutely without an cinematic import.

It’s a great way to waste 90 minutes and laugh yourself silly.

Go see it in the cinema. Chrissie Chau’s t*ts are largest that way.